1. |
Feel Again
01:52
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Every day I struggle, is it for the reasons?
I'm losing my head as winter slowly creeps in
It's a losing battle and I'm on the verge of defeat
Make this go away God, tell me it's a bad dream
I've been browsing self-help books, just trying to find
A cure for all these silly things that eat away at my mind
I would be ok if I could just get back the time
That I have wasted chewing fingernails, but I guess I'll be alright
I'm taking baby steps but I'm covering ground
I'm sick of feeling like I will never live this down
That's why I had to say goodbye and leave behind this town
To change myself, so the next time I around
You will see the changes made as I shed my old skin
I can't trade my inner workings, but I'll take better care of them
I'll stop lying about things that won't matter in the end
I'm busting all my ghosts and I can finally feel again
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2. |
State Of Mind
02:58
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I don't need to be seen in my current state
That's why I've tried to stay the hell away
From everyone I know and love
So they won't have to see me this fucked up
I try and I try again, to put a stop to all of this
It's so childish and meaningless, but I just can't seem to get past it
The mindset that I'll never be, the person that I want you to see
I'm not out to impress, I just want to live and let go
I've built this life on a foundation
Of late nights and over thinking
If I could turn back time tonight
Then maybe I would be alright
But you can't change the past, you can only move forward and hope that you
Have the strength to carry on, and make better decisions than when we were young
So let's make the best of these next few years, and learn to thrive on happiness
Because the world is still a cold dark place, but we don't have to stay that way forever
I try and I try again, but I just can't seem to win
It's one step forward and two steps back, with the weight of the world resting on my back
Growing up, I always thought I'd be, a bigger contribution to society
But I don't blame anybody else, it's my own damn fault that I'm such a mess
Tonight I am making amends
I swear to God I'll be happy again
But you can't change the past, you can only move forward and hope that you
Have the strength to carry on, and make better decisions than when we were young
So let's make the best of these next few years, and learn to thrive on happiness
Because the world is still a cold dark place, but we don't have to stay that way forever
I've got a lot out to get me
Ghosts that no one will ever see
I'm getting better every single day
To Hell with anyone who stands in my way
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3. |
Final Answer
03:31
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If I can dig my way out of this one
Then maybe I can make you see
That what I really meant to say
Was that this thing between you and me
Has long since expired, since the night you broke my heart
And I think I'm finally man enough to say what I meant to say from the start
You won't like the chorus of this song, but I encourage you to sing along
In it holds the answer to your final question
No, we can't still be friends
I don't know if you remember when
You took a crap on my heart and left me in
The saddest state I've ever been
So let me remind you
Well you can't talk your way out of this one
And it's exactly as it seems
I came home early from the show last night and I
Took in the scene
Jake from apartment 215 was sitting naked on my couch
And you were doing things to him that my preacher warned me about
Do you feel the slightest bit of remorse?
We could have talked this out behind closed doors
I can't believe you even had the guts to ask me
No, we can't still be friends
I don't know if you remember when
You took a crap on my heart and left me in
The saddest state I've ever been
I can't get back all that wasted time
And God knows sleep won't come tonight
I hope I never have to see you again
Does that answer your final question?
I wish you all the best
Enjoy your new bed
I am putting this to rest
No, we can't still be friends
I don't know if you remember when
You took a crap on my heart and left me in
The saddest state I've ever been
I can't get back all that wasted time
And God knows sleep won't come tonight
I hope I never have to see you again
No, we can't still be friends
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4. |
Sick And Tired
04:45
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All of my friends are fighting cases or cancer, and I'm just fighting my demons
There are so many people who would love to see another day, and I'm just trying to give all mine away
I am grateful for the life that I was given
Even though sometimes I find it hard to live it
I am blessed beyond my understanding
But I am struggling to deal with the problems that I'm facing
All of my friends are buying houses and diapers, and I'm just buying my way out
I'm getting sick and tired of being sick and tired, but when the lights go out, I know that I am not alone
I am grateful for the life that I was given
Even though sometimes I find it hard to live it
I am blessed beyond my understanding
But I am struggling to deal with the problems that I'm facing
At first it was growing pains
Then it was teen angst
Now a quarter-life crisis
Next up, a complete fucking meltdown
I walk into the cancer ward at Western Baptist
I see all the kids who would kill to have the
The strength to even get up and walk
I guess my problems aren't so bad after all
I am grateful for the life that I was given
Even though sometimes I find it hard to live it
I'm a goddamned train wreck and it's for no reason
I don't think that I will ever win, but for now I'm still breathing
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5. |
Therapy
00:38
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There is purpose for this season of my life
To get to the bottom of everything that keeps me awake at night
I'm done with all the bullshit in my head
And I won't waste another year on it (I won't waste one more year)
This is my release, my therapy
I won't let this win over me
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6. |
The Coast
02:42
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I'd love to see the coast again
But am I being optimistic?
I'd love to feel the warmth again
Of the late July Pacific
I'd love to hold your hand as we take in the city lights
Promise me that you will never forget this night
Without a doubt, I haven't found a set of blue eyes in this town like yours
That could light up the darkest room
For the sake of not sounding too pathetic, I swear to God that I'll just forget it
What could have been, but never was, and now I'm rambling on and on...
Four weeks on the west coast
My flight leaves first thing tomorrow
I'm on the edge of this seaside cliff and my heart tells me to just jump in
But my mind tells me to quit while we're ahead
The coffee shop on rose, that's where I found you all alone
In the corner staring out of the window
I gathered all my guts to say "You look like you could use some company. Do you mind if I take this seat?"
I sat down and we talked for hours
For weeks we spent every day together
I'm not sure I believe in love, but I don't want to fuck this up
What happens when I leave for home?
I can't expect you to come with me and leave behind your family
So I think it's best if we just let this go
Growing up, I dreamed of love
But life has a way of
Showing you what could be
Then leaving you in defeat
This is not like the movies
When I get off my flight you won't be waiting for me
These Summer nights, they never last, they always seem to go by too fast
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7. |
Hopeless
01:40
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I'm sorry, I'm not here right now
Maybe you could come back when i get this sorted out?
I'm losing sleep and I've lost my footing
The ground is cold and this is me putting myself on a pedestal inscribed with a 1
But I'm not really like that, so I think I'm done
With everything that drags me down
So I'll get back up and dig my way out
I'm sorry I was lost in my thoughts
Maybe you could come back? I'd love to talk
About all the things that I missed
When I was sick in bed and feeling hopeless
How's the kids and the wife?
I hope that everyone is doing alright
I'm putting less pressure on myself
And more thought into my health
Just like you always said I should
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8. |
This Is War
03:06
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For what it's worth this year will be the year that I
Finally turn my life around and open up my eyes
I'll venture outside of my one bedroom apartment
I'll start talking with people and stop being so awkward
I'll come back a better man than I was before
Maybe I won't be too nervous to go to the grocery store
I'm leaving all my troubles at the door
Say goodbye to the old me, you won't see him anymore
To all of my old friends who I haven't seen in ages
I'm sorry for the mess I've been, but I promise I am changing
For what it's worth this year will be the year that I
Finally get rid of all the vices in my life
As for my fear of failure, well I'm still terrified
But the greatest men in history failed time after time
What separates the strong from the weak
Is that rock bottom is where we live and we won't accept defeat
I'm leaving all my troubles at the door
Say goodbye to the old me, you won't see him anymore
I'm waging war with the voices in my head
And I'm not going down without a fight so don't let me cave in
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Summer Nights Nashville, Tennessee
Summer Nights is the solo project of producer, songwriter, and multi-instrumentalist Brandon Mangrum.
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